*Must bring up to therapist!!!*

So my super sexy neighbor is single now. Woot!!

But I don’t think I have a chance with him. Oh well. No biggie.

Mo and I are just chillin. Nothing to really talk about right now. Don’t know why I’m typing. Just cuz i suppose.

How are you today? Good? Good.

Mo is going to help me get my laptop back, have I mentioned that before? I’m not sure. I’m so happy and soooo thankful for it though!!! I can’t get over how amazing she is for doing that.

Lalalalala. I’m bored. But not. But I am. Lol.

Oh, by the way, that story “Lonely Girl”, had nothing to do with me. I just was looking at writing prompts and saw one that said “A ghost’s biography”, so that was what popped into my mind. Don’t worry, I’m not depressed or suicidal, however the thoughts have been creeping back a little. I was thinking earlier a thought that I’ve always had, and one that has contributed to my suicidalness and depression. It was, “What happens after death?” I’ve always been very curious about it. I’ve always wanted to know what happens after you die.

I don’t want to think about it much more now because I know that it will lead to suicidal thoughts. It always has. So when I thought about that this morning, I realized that I needed to take my meds. So I did. I’ve been forgetting them, or blowing them off, the past couple days, which is REALLY not good. Obviously. It leads to me thinking about death and not concentrating on life. When I’m depressed, I think about death more, and what happens after you die, but when I’m on my meds I concentrate on life and everything I can be doing with it.

THAT is my warning sign. THAT is how I know I’m falling back into depression.

I have so much to talk to my therapist about:

The warning sings of depression

Not taking my meds (I think I need a new pill box)

Quitting smoking

Finding a job

Getting ready for school

My laptop

Alex

That’s about it. Well then…. TTYL.

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