I think I might be getting depressed again… I’m not sure. I’ve been spending a lot of time in bed lately. I stopped reading again. I need to read… I think it’s due to the fact that I got fired. I have very low motivation to look for a new job even though I know I need to. It’s terrible
I need to get my ass in gear. Ugh. By the way, in case I haven’t made this disclaimer yet, my blog is slightly…. what’s the word? Graphic? No…. Um… I had it but now I lost it. NSFW isn’t right either… It’s… Vulgar maybe? Well I’m sure you catch my drift. It’s only because I swear a lot though. That and I have talked about sex.
Anywho. I need to find a new job asap. Ugh.
Low motivation. Sleeping a lot. Next thing I need to look for is urges. The urge to cut. The feeling that I want to die. But I don’t think I’ll get those. I haven’t in almost a year. I’ve been very good. I’m very proud of myself for how long I’ve gone without self-harming. I can’t break the cycle now just because I lost my job and feel like a complete failure.
Also, I’ve made up my mind about weed. As I think I mentioned before, weed is like medication. It works for some, but other people experience severe side effects. I get those too often than not. Therefore, I am not against smoking weed, I just won’t do it myself. I also feel it needs to be taken in moderation. Those who smoke constantly are abusing it. Those who smoke only occasionally maybe once or twice a day have it right. Idk. That’s just my opinion though.