Parents

I have severe anxiety and issues with people hiding things from me and I feel like it stemmed from my parents hiding so much about themselves from me my whole life. Maybe that’s where I learned to lie as well. With my parents lying to me, my brothers, each other and even themselves. The lied about being in love with each other. I’m beginning to think they never really were. They probably both wanted a family and happened to be together at the time. Or, maybe not. Maybe they were in love, then just fell out of it, and kept up appearances for the sake of us, the kids. But when? When did they stop loving each other? This question has been eating away at me for so long now. Did they think that adopting a child would “fix” things between them? Is that why they adopted my little brother? Well clearly it didn’t work. They’re parenting styles clashed too much. They always have. They’ve never had the same ideas when it came to raising us. I saw it a lot when I was younger but I never fully realized until recently. 

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